Zambian Parents Must Help Children

NEWS of pupils allegedly taking part in a sex party, soon after others at Sathya-Sai School in Ndola were recently excluded and suspended, made very sad reading.
On Friday evening, police arrested about 42 pupils most of them from a private school, Naboonga Trust School, for drinking alcohol and engaging in free-for-all sex at one of the houses in Chingola’s Riverside residential area.
The birthday party alleged to have been organised by a grade 10 pupil from Kabundi High School attracted about 100 schoolboys and girls from various schools in Chingola.  The event, however, turned into a sex party after the pupils got drunk from the alcohol they were consuming and became unruly.
This led to the arrest of 26 boys and 16 girls, who were released on Saturday after admission of guilt.
We can only echo Young Women Christian Association (YWCA) Copperbelt co-ordinator Sharon Chisanga who said these children are abusing their own rights and putting their lives in danger by taking part in such events.
We are left to wonder where the owner of the property was to allow such immoral activities to occur and indeed where the parents and guardians of these children were.
Where are these children getting these ideas from? It is more the reason why parents should take a more hands-on approach in order to know the kind of activities their children indulge in. When adults cultivate a close relationship with their children, it is very easy to notice when they are up to any mischief or indeed any other form of anti-social behaviour.
A responsible parent should always know the kind of friends their children interact with, even the other parents and guardians in order to curtail peer pressure especially for those children who are not emotionally strong and are easily influenced by others.
In as much as children’s rights have to be respected, parents should be able to draw a line where these rights affect the life of a child.
For instance, there are parents who allow their children to come and go as they please: go partying at odd hours, hang out at malls or watch late movies in the name of children’s rights.
It is necessary that when children are allowed to do these things there is parental guidance or indeed chaperones to ensure that children do not get into mischief.
Children should realise from an early age that for every action there are consequences; parents can ensure this through a number of measures, for example, by taking time to  explain and reason with children and in some cases even withhold certain privileges as a form of punishment for bad behaviour.
Proverbs 13:24 states that “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” The Lord uses discipline to reveal to us any wrongdoing.
This is how parents should also reveal the truth to their children. If children do not feel the consequences of their bad behaviour, they will not understand that such behaviour requires punishment. Parents realise disciplining a child is always out of tough love; with the hope that the child will grow up into a law-abiding and responsible adult.
As Naboonga director Francesca Mulenga pointed out, the school has no control over pupils when they leave the school premises. The behaviour and conduct of pupils after school is the responsibility of parents and guardians, but unfortunately this brings the name of the school into ridicule.
“In as much as we do not condone the wrongs the pupils at our school do, we will equally not be comfortable if the school is associated to the bad behaviour of pupils during school holidays,” Mrs Mulenga said.
She said the party was not organised by the school and was not held at the school premises. The pupils who had closed opted to go partying, maybe with the permission of their parents.
We have emphasised time and again that teachers can only do so much, the bigger part of child upbringing is the responsibility of parents, guardians and other adults in their lives. These are the ones who are expected to provide a firm foundation and impart good morals to these children.
We hope that the parents and guardians will take time to explain the dangers of such behaviour to these 42 children.
When under the influence of alcohol, children are prone to abuse, contracting sexually-transmitted diseases or even physical harm, which could negatively affect the rest of their young lives.

Posted by Editor on April 9, 2014. Filed under STYLE. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry