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My Husband Cheated, Should I Cheat Also, To Feel Better?
Dear Readers,
I prefer to go as Anonymous. I have been married for one an a half year now. I am a 28 year old woman. My husband and I decided not to have kids until after two years of marriage, to enable us enjoy the home before the kids come.
Sometime last month, My husband was taking a shower after work. His phone rang and I decided to take the call for him. That is not wrong because we take each others call. My husband stored this number as workplace I quickly took the call and what I heard shocked.
Baby, I have been trying to call you, why didn’t you pick my calls on time? Are you home yet? I was stunned, just a year and a half into marriage and my hubby was already cheating on me? I answered the lady and told her, I was his wife and she quickly dropped the call. When he came out of the bathroom, I confronted him and he didn’t deny. He asked me to forgive him, that it was the devil’s handwork, that it will not repeat itself again.
I feel hurt and in pain. Why did he cheat on me? What will happen when we have kids. Should I cheat on him, so i don’t feel hurt when he does the same? Please I need your honest opinion Regards.
From Inbox-Unedited
Posted by
TimZ
July 14, 2014 at 1:51 pm
Mmmmm sister, do u ‘ve someone u wud cheat with? Are u going to tel yo habby dat u ‘ve also cheated on him? For hw long ‘re u goin to cheat so dat u can feel dat u ‘ve cheated on him enough? Wel u know yoself better. Bible say vegence is for GOD. My sis u need to be prayerful coz u ‘ve a spirit of prostitution. Even if yo habby did not cheat on u, u were goin to cheat on him as u seem very ready to cheat on him. REPENT.
Chief of Grief
July 14, 2014 at 2:01 pm
YES!!But with me ofcourse,just square it up& quit licking your wounds.
awe sure
July 14, 2014 at 2:04 pm
@TimZ, i agree with you, he asked for foergivness, u re asking whether you can cheat on him also. Its like you already have someone to cheat with. Maybe you are already cheating on him. Just confess to your husband also and ask for his forgiveness and who told you that if you do so it will stop hurting you. By the way, if you cheat on him, he will leave you for that other one, but the man you will cheat with wont marry you.
kabuswe
July 14, 2014 at 2:38 pm
Tel us how u intend to cheat on him.can u call that marriage? Where husband and wife cheat on each other? Is that the promise you made to each other,think about it! For me this tells me both of u are cheating reason being you are ready to find a partner more conviently… So get down talk to each other and share the consquences of cheating on both you and your husband and seek guidance from elders.God bless u and your marriage
the future
July 14, 2014 at 2:41 pm
be prayerful my sister because the devil wants to use you and dump you after trouble catches up with you.
manage the pressure for now and eventually it will heal and you will forget about it.
Abaakaabaa
July 14, 2014 at 2:47 pm
Am telling you that is war you are bringing in your marriage and if you find that you can’t forgive him then just leave him alone because it’s not good to be with someone and have second thoughts otherwise your marriage life will be a pretence and sex my dear becomes useless,am speaking from experience neglect my advice at your peril …forgive and forget or divorce and move on!!
himself
July 14, 2014 at 2:54 pm
you are a foolish woman coz the bible says a foolish woman destroys the home with her own hands.Is that the option you can suggest to the masses,why not prayers.Cheat on him so that we shall lough at you.As for us we will remain married.
WEAKILEAKS
July 14, 2014 at 3:13 pm
fault finding why ukwasuka ama phone ashili yenu you wanted to find out who was calling.if u look for faults in someone definately you will find it.now you was us to agree with you that you begin cheating him lobe. out of ichifukushi bakamitombapo fye nakakwata hiv.careful epo mpelele.
kunda
July 14, 2014 at 3:15 pm
No you shouldn’t forgive and forget if you can’t forgive leave him.cheating will just make the situation worse. that thought should not even b entertained in ur mind
masiku
July 14, 2014 at 3:43 pm
My sister too bad for u,but its nt too later for u to react.Remember there is HIV,so think abt it.As for me better you leave him and find some one who ll b faithful coz that is what it takes to b in marriage
chile1
July 14, 2014 at 3:57 pm
Iwe tawsyishiba ati ubu chende bwa mwaume tabonaula inganda,try cheatin on him and see hw fast he’ll chase thy ass
tutu
July 14, 2014 at 4:01 pm
yes my dear,u ave 2 cheat on him too,that z the only way u wil feel better but only wit me…bamayo maybe tamwalemutombeshapo bwino,anyway I wil b de judge f that nganatombapo
katuta lukaka
July 14, 2014 at 4:21 pm
MY DEAR TWO WRONGS CANT MAKE A RIGHT.
ROMASAIDO AND KEIDO
July 14, 2014 at 4:36 pm
The worst thing a man hurt most in a relationship is to be cheated,never try to cheat sister.
yellow mellow
July 14, 2014 at 5:11 pm
50/50
sata
July 14, 2014 at 6:43 pm
its better u leave him my dear,coz wat u are thinking will end up killing him someday.
wow
July 14, 2014 at 7:03 pm
Marriage today is just for show. They just aint loyal
DR
July 14, 2014 at 8:08 pm
if a woman cheats she is gone,thats how Men are.that doesnt mean men shuold be cheating
counselor
July 14, 2014 at 9:02 pm
You have 2 options, either to forgive him or divorce him. Your proposal of cheating shud not even be an option. Ubuchende bwa mwaume tabutoba ng’anda. But 4 u, the day you will caught, the whole world will be on you.
ewa
July 14, 2014 at 9:56 pm
Awe koma mwakamba mwebanthu. Mwamuna sapundiwa hule iyayi. Eli nafuti, two wrongs are wrongs. They never ever make a “right”. Sis, forgive us fwe bashipundwa ihule. Save your marriage.
DIP STICK
July 15, 2014 at 12:31 am
JUST DIVORCE AND MOVE ON. AVOID FIGHTING FIRE FOR FIRE
Kamushi
July 15, 2014 at 1:22 am
lack of comunication,find out y he cheated?dnt try revenge u’l regret.mind u few men want 2marry
wisdom
July 15, 2014 at 2:42 am
Zambians this is the spirit to build each other. In marriage there is nothing like perfect pipo your.Do not make a mistake in effort to correct your husband
ebony
July 15, 2014 at 7:26 am
he asked for forgivness so forgive.
mwansa
July 15, 2014 at 7:50 am
Sorry!!!!!! You should get in touch with me both of you so as to build your home. Never you act on impulse. You will destroy your marriage. Do not approach jealousy people. We marry once.
God bless you.
Mateyo
July 15, 2014 at 8:35 am
our God is holy to an extent that when you just look at anyone lustfully you have already sinned. dear writer first thing for you is to repent and then sit down with your hubby and maybe an elder who has been married for a longer period than yourselves to know the next step to take.
sanks division
July 15, 2014 at 9:42 am
enough advise givev. so make a right decision.
Dee Mwansa
July 15, 2014 at 10:04 am
Just cheat on him my dear its ok! Its common nowadays among women; tit for tat, lol!
Novice Mutalange Mulembe
July 15, 2014 at 12:35 pm
Paying him back by cheating on him will not make you feel happy because every time you look at your husband, your conscious will make you feel guilty. Ask yourself is it really what I want to do. Count yourself fortunate that he even admitted because most men will not. Leave it to God who knows our hearts better. He who has started something in us will go all the way to finish it.
Charles
July 15, 2014 at 12:50 pm
If you have decided to forgive him then forget it (To forgive is to forget )but if its hard to forgive,divorce him and move on. No one is righteous even our grand fathers they rich 60 years in marriage its because of forgiveness.
Now one thing why is he going out, you need to reseach may be they is one thing which is not in the bedroom.
Chief of Grief
July 15, 2014 at 1:22 pm
Mwandi belakubepa.Conscience ifinshi.Akutombeshafye naiwe to level things up chapwa.Marriage nowadays has lost fu**king meaning,its gone to the dogs.Ukese nkakuchinde po waunfwa te!!
Ruth Nyirenda
July 15, 2014 at 2:14 pm
Marriage of infidelity and mistrust is going not anywhere. Decide whether to leave or stay…though the thoughts of your husband’s cheating development will always be in your mind.
M.M
July 19, 2014 at 9:12 pm
How did you marry? Did you follow normal procedure for marriage?where you taught by bana chimbusa before you got married? I guess you were not propely taught by bana chimbusa.If you were taught propely you would not even thought of cheating also as a propely married woman.
papa
July 15, 2014 at 8:36 am
what moderation naumwe ba tumfweko?