- Stay Connected
Socialize
How to Understand a Woman
IF you’re the type of woman who always has something (smart-mouthed) to say, constantly speaking your mind when no one even asked for your opinion in the first place, so quick to call your man out on something he did and sometimes told by your man that you’re the type of woman who “loves to nag about what he isn’t doing right”, well, then you are just everything life has to offer. You’re an amazing young queen. Know that you’re very attractive to a mentally mature man. You’re just the type of woman a strong man wants, because a king wants a queen who can match his strength and speak life into him with her so-called smart mouth and help him grow.
The truth is, Women don’t nag or “talk back” for nothing. It’s called communication. If you are a leader as a man, you should be. Your woman wouldn’t have to tell you what to do. Women don’t want to have to tell us as men what to do. Women want a man to be considerate, caring, romantic and mature without her even having to ask or remind him. This is always my response to men who try to reduce a strong woman’s words to “nagging”. So when your woman calls you out on something you didn’t do right, don’t be defensive, don’t complain, just listen to what she is about to say and say, “Thank you for having my back baby,” then do what she asked for.” It’s not a weakness at all. It’s regard for your partner .
Last week, I was blessed with an opportunity to speak to a group of men on how to understand a woman. One of the young men stood up and said, “smart-mouthed women will be single forever, unless they learn to submit to a man and let him lead. And all these ladies that think just because they have a career and some degree; that somehow they are better than a man and try to play the role of a man, don’t even see that they’re single for a reason. Don’t you think a man is meant to check his woman and not the other way around?”
This said a lot to me. The truth is, as men we’re too proud to listen to what a woman would ask us to do. So let’s get this straight. As a man, you don’t take orders from a woman, but you listen to everything your friends ask you to do, even if it’s illegal or counterproductive? But when you land yourself in problems, the first person you call is your woman and here you are, still refusing to listen to her?
Are you in a relationship with your friends or your woman? How can you be so quick to argue with your woman, call her names, yet when your fake, manipulative male friends tell you to jump, you’re all like, “how high?
The truth is, when you earn your woman’s respect as a man, she may disagree with you, but she won’t argue with you. Converse with her, don’t argue with her. Listen to her, don’t ignore her. Do you want a weak-minded little girl? You want a pushover? If you do, it’s because you’re a weak-minded little boy yourself, un-aroused by the femininity of a strong woman. I always say that there is nothing more attractive to a strong man than a strong-minded and intelligent woman who will speak her mind, not bite her tongue but, tell him when he is wrong.
I personally don’t want a ‘yes’ woman. I don’t want one who will agree with me all the time and tell me what I want to hear because she is scared to lose me.
That’s not love. At the end of the day, she is my partner. I need someone to tell it as it is. Someone who is blunt but respectful. Someone that tells me the truth I need to hear. Someone that will speak life into me. A woman who loves a man so much will tell him he is wrong to his face, because she loves him and wants to help him grow.
It’s very unmanly for us as men to complain about a woman that tries to help us be better people and mature from being merely an ale into being a man. Let me tell you the secret to getting your woman to treat you like a king and submit to you. If you are like a king, she will treat you like one.
Let us learn to listen to our women. As men, we’re so quick to keep a woman sexually stimulated, which is great, but we have to also remember to keep her emotionally stimulated at all times by just listening to her. Don’t just hear her, listen to her; meaning you actually comprehend and take in her words so they make you a better man. Women with a ‘smart mouth’ and attitude make the sweetest, caring, loyal and most considerate women that have your interests at heart.
Please men, don’t call her ‘insecure’. Cut off all your ‘side ladies’ and be willing to faithfully commit yourself to her. Rip out your own heart, and give it to her totally. Then she will open up her fist and give you her heart. Put your heart in her chest, put a crown on her head and let her be your queen.
Just because a woman has a ‘smart mouth’, temper or attitude, it does not mean she isn’t a sweet girl. A woman, who’s been through so much, can give you so much, because deep down, they are caring and loyal. Once you earn her respect, she will do anything for you. Do not confuse this type of woman with “wanting to act like a man’ or ‘playing a man’s role’. It’s not her fault she’s mentally stronger than all the males she’s ever met. She’s not mean or hard; it’s just that she’s not about to be submissive to a weak man. Once she sees you’re strong enough to be the man, she will respect you and never speak ‘smart mouthed’ to you, unless she wants you to be romantically aggressive with her at that particular time.
Until recently in Africa, our women were treated like property. Like they were being sold from their father to a man who paid the highest ‘dowry’ for her. Women have always been treated like slaves even in this country, which is why our society loves to label intelligent women who think for themselves as ‘crazy or disrespectful and uncultured’, to perpetuate this misconception that women are the weaker sex. Well, with the way things have changed, if she’s crazy for having her own mind, then I’m crazy about her and will always love her.
Being a man to a woman is not just about being good and making our women feel special only in bed. It’s also about being her strength, being understanding and emotionally supportive to her. Don’t call her crazy or disrespectful just because she reacts with a ‘smart mouth’. Don’t call her over emotional just because she may get irritated easily. As men, let’s be more understanding of a loyal woman. We have to learn to be more understanding of a woman. Women are nurturers by nature. She just wants to know she has our undivided attention so she can let go of her wall and give us her all.
Don’t let a strong woman scare you away. She’s been through a lot more than you could even imagine. We must be patient with her. Once she meets a strong woman who knows how to take control and can prove to her with his actions he is trustworthy and loyal, she’ll let in and work on her disposition. But, if we want our woman to grow for us, we must be willing to grow for her. What kind of man snaps at his woman and throws a tantrum when he’s corrected? A strong man is secure enough in his manhood to be corrected and leads a woman he knows loves him. She can help mold you into a leader for her and your children.
This I will not hide – If you’re unwilling to change and grow for your woman, you lack the strength to be a man. Iron sharpens iron. Let your strong woman be the iron to mentally sharpen you. If you’re not willing to change for your woman, don’t be surprised when her feelings for you change.
Some females do not deserve a young king, because she isn’t strong enough to make him a better man. She will just say and do anything to keep him around, even when that means allowing him to stay immature. A woman who loves a man may do things he doesn’t like, speak ‘smart mouthed’ or behave a little jealous at times, but that does not take away from her worth.
In conclusion, let me say that I try not to hold a woman being emotional or jealous against her, because in a way, she’s just showing me she cares. Some women are too shy to come out and say, “I want you, and I want you to want only me. I don’t want any other woman to have you. I don’t want you ‘talking’ to other women better than you do with me. She wants to be your woman and you her man. That’s all she wants.
Till next week, God bless you and your relationships.
The writer of this article is a life coach and motivational speaker as well as master of ceremonies for both corporate and social functions. For his services, call 0978980332 or email him on [email protected], follow him on facebook Emmanuel Mukula – Life Coach or on twitter @ Emmanuel_mukula.
Posted by Editor
on October 13, 2014. Filed under LIFE & STYLE, STYLE.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0.
Both comments and pings are currently closed.
monica
October 13, 2014 at 11:26 am
Tell them men. Well spoken author, men really need to get that in their heads. Due to lack of this knowledge or rather ignorance by our men, we dnt have the so called blissful relationships. As a strong,smart and educated woman, I would rather be single and happy than hang around a man that will call me a nag
tongabull 10
October 13, 2014 at 12:08 pm
Monnnnica or money that is the only problem with African women once ba Kwata ka ngwee ninshi lwanya .
123
October 13, 2014 at 1:20 pm
MORE NIKA…. MORE PANTI…
kakolwe
October 13, 2014 at 11:28 am
Mine is a smart mouth, critic, judge and nagging. My secrete? I am able to make my decisions, projects or topics come out of her as though they are hers. I support her & carry on with her talking all along at ‘her great idea’ going forward. The only time she is quiet is after she has exploded in a wild orgazm. Any time I want peace of mind, I escort her there at any time & leave her to snore it away!!
IF NOT
October 13, 2014 at 11:55 am
most guys seem not to understand their women. Hope you pick one or two things from this article and work on it.
tongabull 10
October 13, 2014 at 11:59 am
I like the article thank you and God bless
Emmanuel Mukula
October 13, 2014 at 12:32 pm
I did the writing & it’s time to keep quiet.
shakira wapa zed
October 13, 2014 at 12:56 pm
Nafuti Nafuti!!Jerabooo unit! I love me some tumfweko!
kasantana
October 13, 2014 at 3:37 pm
some women nipakanwa chabe,ngawaponya kaputula nothing,kalelila fye kwati kalafwa
Oversight
October 13, 2014 at 5:05 pm
There’s no point arguing with a woman, they are always right even when they are wrong.
chichi
October 13, 2014 at 7:25 pm
an interesting article,men we should always remember that our women are our strongest partners almost in all our dealings,they play a critical role in our living,so should give them due respect,moreover they are our mothers,
mass
October 13, 2014 at 10:41 pm
Prayer Cures the Sick
Is any among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord: and the prayer of faith shall save him that is sick, and the Lord shall raise him up; and if he have committed sins, it shall be forgiven him. (James 5:14-15 ASV)
(This passage is evil because people who believe it may not get proper medical treatment for their sick children.)
jj
October 14, 2014 at 12:52 pm
Ulishilu koswe iwe never drag the Lords name and Word in vain God forgive you clueless head
barose activist
October 13, 2014 at 11:05 pm
de article is just too long. abanakashi kulabalyafye! mwafwa mwliwa. I am just jokin
kingsley
October 14, 2014 at 12:55 am
nice article bro
Yongwe
October 14, 2014 at 1:12 am
Well said…great!!!!!!1
shakira wapa zed
October 14, 2014 at 8:43 am
we make the decisions and we are always right on top of that our suspicions and intuitions are always spot on.Actually we Wear the pants in a relationship and you know it Guys,youre literally headless with the power of a woman.Headless chickens
shakira wapa zed
October 14, 2014 at 8:47 am
“Behind every successful man ´Theres a woman”You simply have no abilities to function without us,your lives are full of drama without us,examples here are endless,unwanted children,drinking without knowng when to stop,spending Money uselessly,a million girlfriends and the worst of them all you bring aids to your faithful wives.Mwalitumpa kwena mwefyaume mwe.Problem you always think with your second head between your legs
Chief Of Grief
October 14, 2014 at 12:02 pm
I personally detest a nagging Bit******tch!!The only way i keep my ladies loud mouths shut is when i get to stuff/shove my di*****ck up their throat & make ‘em gugg with my seminal fluid chapwa…..!!
jane mulembwe
October 14, 2014 at 12:50 pm
Ba chief of grief WHO wants to suck your Little uncircumsised anconda,mulaibepa kwenaba guy imwe!musula wenu
Chief Of Grief
October 14, 2014 at 1:11 pm
@ ka mulembwe noko intwenukane!!Wafumi ku rear entrance yakwa wiso tefyo??Panyopako bwamba bwansoka iwe kolokombwa waba amalepe kwikoshi makaka……
jane mulembwe
October 14, 2014 at 1:22 pm
kakala kenu ba john isa ulye ubwali imwe,get a life,sokomuntu unyela kulukungu iwe,ulala kwachenama iwe
Chief Of Grief
October 14, 2014 at 1:36 pm
Ni wiso nangula noko wabosele ati nine john solye ubwali aiyi.Am my own boss koswe iwe wunfwa?I fire my own shots at a young age mwaunfwa chikala imwe!!waba amanyami ukununka mukanwa kembo solola iwe…Ulenposelafye na time….katantikefye pamusebo wenchushi iwe!!VOETSEK
jane mulembwe
October 14, 2014 at 7:33 pm
Hahahahahahahah my own boss kapoli iwe,you wish ka john solye ubwali iwe,get a life makaka iwe!I think if you took part in the olympic games you would surely get a gold medal for those insults,chimbwi no plan iwe
IF NOT
October 14, 2014 at 12:10 pm
Mass, may God forgive you for you do not know what you are writing/saying about that passage from the book of James. mulesabailako kuli fimbi not the word of God PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Trixy
October 14, 2014 at 1:26 pm
I learnt a lesson a long time ago that you look down upon your woman and you are headed for trouble. These ladies guide us, make us and control us (in a positive way). Shakira wapa Zed may sound really mean, but she is spot on….we are simply reckless without these women guys….I personally cannot run a project without the input of my lady….Result? Success!
shakira wapa zed
October 14, 2014 at 1:32 pm
akaume aka ka mano ako,tell them and i appreciate your honesty and humility big up and hands Down zebigi,my brother
Sithabile
October 14, 2014 at 2:16 pm
Imwe ba Chief of Grief stop the insults please
club zero
October 14, 2014 at 7:07 pm
@shakira wapa zed is a hole,hw can anyone understand you,how much per nite ba shakira pa zed
shakira wapa zed
October 14, 2014 at 7:37 pm
@club zero mafi yobe waumfwa,you uses such a name,do your research well that club was based in a komboni in kitwe,so it clearly prooves your kombonic manners,you idiot
Lasa Lasa
October 15, 2014 at 8:31 pm
Am loving this Chief of grief guy, i actually read comments because of him