Most arguments are usually due to miscommunication, couples show love in different ways. Example some people prefer words of encourangment often, the prefer appreciation, others prefer to be called often. Then they are others who prefer dates, spending alot of time together, taking walks together. Ask your partner, “what do you expect from me”? Do you want alot of time together, do you prefer taking walks together, do you prefer dates and words of encouragement? do you prefer to be called often? Once you conclude on what your partner expects from you then now you can start communicating in the same language.
Is there something you are uncomfortable with? talk to your partner avoid making assumptions and blame games. Has your partner spoken to you about what makes them uncomfortable and you are upset? have shame! Stop emotional blackmail. Let your partner be free to air out their views without you getting upset.
Arguments.
in order to reduce arguments you need to ask yourselves “why do we argue”? you will discover that most of the times couples argue over the same things. is it money issues? is it bad alcohol consuption? is it infidelity issues? is it bad attitude? is it about the phone?. The moment you discover the reason why you argue then both of you need to accept your contributions to the arguments.
Do you have bad drinking habits? begin to work on it. Do you have a bad attitude? begin to work on that,no one has time to tolerate a bad attitude life is already hard someone cant start to deal with your bad attitude too. Is it the phone? put your house in order. clean up your phone and never give your partner any reason to doubt you. if possible avoid leaving the phone unanswered, if you are busy pick up and tell her you will call her back, there is nothing worse than someone always missing your calls, you begin to think you are not priority and many women can attest to this! you find that you will be calling him all night and then he comes to call back or text at 10 the following morning saying he didnt hear his phone, how do you react to such? even if it is true, such things may cause problems . its human nature. Call each other frequently and spend time together, take walks hold hands .
The problem is that we want to spend alot of time with other people as opposed to building our relationships. Monday to Friday we have work to attend to then saturday the whole day you are with your boys drinking sunday you are nursing a hungover and getting ready for work, what time do you have for your woman? Create time and bond without the distubances of phones. Most women think men have no emotions, well i dont blame them! men have been raised to think that showing emotions is unmanly and that is wrong. Pick up your phone and appreciate your man, send him talk time, take him out on a date and pay the bill, you will not die. Find time to buy him things like vests, slippers, boxers, towels etc just the simple things and you will see how he will praise you even if all you spent was a K30, its the effort that counts.
Avoid lying, men especially! you tell your woman that you home meanwhile you are at the bar, such little lies create trust issues among couples and bring up unnecessary arguments. in this developed Era the phone has done more harm than good in most relationships, its easy to lie over the phone it become even easier to avoid each other over the phone, phones have replaced actual dates and spending time together, it has become easier to cheat. Communicate effectively and work on fixing your problems within the shortest period of time, avoiding each other causes more harm than good.