Sometime ago, I heard the story of a newly wedded couple. They were still in their honeymoon. So, one day they were eating together and the wife took meat and ate. The thing didn’t sit well with the man and he cautioned her.
The wife was like what, because of meat? And that was how problem started from their honeymoon.
The problem wasn’t because she took the meat from the plate, no. The problem was because she took the meat when they’ve not finished eating.
This story brings me to my subject matter; upbringing. Whether you believe it or not, your upbringing can affect your relationship either positively or negatively.
Just like the couple above, there are homes you don’t dare touch your meat, even bones self, until you are done with your food and there are homes even before they touch food, they’ve already sampled one or two meats depending on their buoyancy.
We all are raised uniquely and differently and it’s very important you discuss your upbringing with whomsoever you are in a relationship with.
There are guys who their father never for once mentioned “I love you” to them nor receive love from their fathers. Today, they’re finding it hard to give love.
The same thing with some ladies. Their father never told them how much they loved them. Today, they’re vulnerable. Just one single “I love you” from a guy, they will fall.
Dear parents, learn to tell your children how much you love them. Done assume they know. Verbalize it.
Most of the views we hold about men and women today came from our upbringing, what our parents taught us, how our parents treated each other.
Just this afternoon, I read a post from a guy who his father taught that, he should never see the wife he’s going to marry as part of the family, that she’s a stranger, not his relative nor blood.
You can imagine the kind of things that this woman will pass through in the hand of this guy because of what his had taught him.
A guy that watches his father beat his mum for every single mistake, unless he knows better, he will beat his wife too. The same goes to a lady that watches her mother insults and disrespects her husband.
In conclusion, discuss your upbringing with your prospective partner. What did his parents taught him about women. Women are commodity and object of sexual satisfaction? How was he raised? What are the things his mother taught her about men? Men are scum? Men are the same? Men are cheats? What are their relationship with their parents like? Which of them do they flow well with and why? Discuss your upbringing.
© Okolie Samuel