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Women Love Tough Men, Men Prefer Good Looks
Women love their men to be powerful and dominant.
For a woman to feel feminine, she must be with a man who is masculine
Even though there’s been a trend away from the alpha male of the 1970s and 1980s, most women prefer strong men.
While most men look for good looks and good bodies, women need reliable, independent and strong-minded men. They look for men who take charge.
Psychologist Asiphe Ndlela, who is based in Illovo, Johannesburg, says girls are subconsciously hard-wired to respond sexually to men with higher values than themselves and also to men with higher values than other men in their circles.
“You’d think women like men who are soft, weak and romantic, but if there is one thing that turns women on, it is a man with dominance and aura.
tough
Tough:Women prefer this type of men.
“Men are aroused by being dominant and by submissive women, while women are aroused by being submissive and by dominant men. In the bedroom, inequality beats equality,” Ndlela says.
She says women can spot a man who lacks dominance miles away, and adds that almost every quality of a dominant male trigger arousal in the female brain. These include dominant scents, dominant gaits, deep voices, height, swagger, bravado and displaying wealth.
Ndlela says human beings are by nature not attracted to someone who conveys powerlessness.
“For a woman to feel womanish, she must be with a man who is masculine. When she is with a guy who is not dominant, she feels he is just another girl.
“Many men are motivated to act when they sense or perceive a woman’s desire for security or for some external strength,” she says.
Ndlela says most women have submission fantasies and immensely popular submission themes on television are not helpful. She says most heterosexual women are wired to find sexual submission arousing, but this is not the case in human beings or in most female mammals.
What characteristics does a dominant man have?
Ndlela says he is ambitious, a doer, comfortable in his own skin, confident and he exudes power.
She says in every woman is a deep-rooted instinct that prompts her to gravitate to such males.
But one should never seek other people’s approval on how to behave in a social situation and never to be concerned what others think of you, she says.
“Being a dominant male is all about attitude and projecting the image of fun to be with, that you are in control. To attract women, stand with your feet six to ten inches apart and your toes pointing outward,” Ndlela says.
She explains that some men who are dominated by their partners may have experienced abuse in childhood.
“This is often due to psychological conditioning, where they have been taught to associate domination and pain as a form of love.
“Another explanation from psychology is that some men resent, or are uncomfortable with, the idea that a man must always be in control,” she says.
For these men, says Ndlela, a dominant woman is a relief from having to make decisions, asserting authority and initiating new ideas.
They don’t mind a woman taking charge. In fact, they love it. They look for women who will “wear the trousers” in the home.
Ndlela says these men are attracted to strong and confident women, who likewise enjoy holding the reins.
Sowetan.
Posted by Editor
on June 16, 2012. Filed under LIFE & STYLE, STYLE.
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nyekete
June 16, 2012 at 1:57 pm
ubusuma bwamwanakashi bwaba mu mwaume, u ladies wo ar nt okpad find yr own man, to avoid aids
The Boss Has Spoken
June 16, 2012 at 2:00 pm
I’m the boss and I call the shots always while she sits back and relaxes. Its in me, i love it and it wont change. I’m the the Bawse that what God expects of me over my woman.
chanda mwamba
June 16, 2012 at 2:02 pm
foolish staff chimo chikapena ati psychologist. umuntu mutwe, umutwefye ngawaingila ninshi chapwa peto
Mpika
June 16, 2012 at 2:14 pm
Personal experience can never be used to define women in general… from which side of the world are you standing from??? I agree with you in some points but your thesisy about women lack anthropolocal suport… coz not every woman thinks like that..
miichael samishe
June 16, 2012 at 6:15 pm
rubbish give us the three (3) points
GunnerME
June 16, 2012 at 6:22 pm
Well written article & true in every sense. Those who are in conflict with this must try the opposite, hopefully you will man-up & come back here to tell us your experiences, which I believe you ‘d gladly love to forget as quickly as possible.
Bishop
June 16, 2012 at 7:29 pm
One man’s meat is another’s man’s poison. We have different tastes and there are exeption to the rule
Chwicwi
June 17, 2012 at 12:38 am
Bane osaibala nkani ya Bill Clinton na Monica.Mzimai alasa!
smart lubaini
June 17, 2012 at 6:37 am
mupola bakamba, ukukonkelela ifyo kuti wapena. women are just to insecure,you protray such and the next day shz mad at you. you stand strong for her and says you are too strong for me ,you her the best sex but tomorrow complains of attention.so big man part last kubafye efyo waba
kuti bakudelela bakembo ab
Pulamasaka
June 17, 2012 at 10:38 am
rough like GBM..ghhahahahaha
shoket 47
June 17, 2012 at 11:50 am
Musculine & dominant..lol.anyway,it just depends on ‘who you are’..i believe in comfortability when am socialising with my lady.when making decisions,i believe in seeking opinion & weighing the difference since am another imperfect human being & i dnt knw ‘everything’..i dnt lyk ‘calling the shots’ all the time whether she likes it or nt. Thats unfair.its better 4 ‘us’ to be under the ‘spot-light’ than having my woman hiding under mine or me under hers…just an opinion..
Magwazavi
June 17, 2012 at 12:20 pm
So are sugesting that all men should be mascular??? we cant all be the same.just make sure your women reach orgasm
Phiri
June 17, 2012 at 1:16 pm
Thats exactly who i am tough mascular and i leave everything to my wife to deside or plan. All i do is to wait for bed time i tell her which position i want for sex. When her decisions and plans fail which they always do thats when i come in and show her that i am the man. I do it my way and she keeps loving it for that i love her becouse i know a womans brains are between her legs never in the head.
nandipak
June 17, 2012 at 4:39 pm
thats y am in love with ‘ba conductor’
Big Ken
June 17, 2012 at 5:08 pm
@nandipak you just need the tuma 20pin daily.
nandipak
June 17, 2012 at 6:05 pm
come on big ken! 20 is enough to top up petrol everyday,my smal car has gud fuel consption..hehe
Zaggazembewe
June 17, 2012 at 6:19 pm
You are wrong coz thats directly tells me that all you have said is from your own experience,to me it does’nt make any sense.
umu bemba nkonko
June 17, 2012 at 7:38 pm
elyo lwanya!lwati na pwiiiiiiiiii
Uwakwamununga
June 17, 2012 at 9:48 pm
AWE FWEBO TEFYO TWAISHIBA KWAMUNUNGA.UBU BWENA BUFI.
knobkerie
June 18, 2012 at 9:28 am
As a MAN,i’ve always been in control and a domineer. Of course there are always slip-ups in life but when it comes 2 women,I always exude with unbeatable confidence that’s why even sexually,im a man of prowess and pre-dominance.I guess im jus “tougher” than dem.
jamoka
June 18, 2012 at 12:38 pm
A man should not to listen to the woman in everything,the man must have the decision on your own,if you see a man always freeze before the woman,think that is the problem,ether alimulisha “kolyokolyo”or ender pit cot so that the wife she can do whatever she like,she can weare the shot skirt,trousers,even in the church also she weare the man have nothing to say.the people a could condemn,is the govt leaders.must think twice about that.
Chikake Maiteneke Chingola
June 18, 2012 at 3:07 pm
I totally agree with the contents of this article. I remember some three months ago, i had some sexual encounter with a lady married to a muslim old man of Asian origin. This lady claimed that she last had sex with her hubby 18 years ago. So, i hooked her and gave her a very good sex that she appreciated me and was crying for me that i made her feel like a woman after a very long time. Since that time, i have been avoiding her for she been demanding sex almost time i meet her. She is even prepared to come to my flat at mid-night just for sex because her hubby does not function due to abnormal levels of sugar in his blood.